Yesterday, The National Archives (not a very catchy name. They should come up with something with a little more flare) "lost" a computer hard drive which contained sensitive data from the Clinton administration, including Social Security numbers, Secret Service and White House operating procedures, and the truth about the blow job incident. What Clinton doesn't want you to know is that he actually has erectile dysfuntion. The whole Monica Lewinsky thing was just a cover up so people would think he could get it up. Well, the truth's out now. He can't. Realistically, Clinton is probably the one who stole the hard drive to keep this information hidden, but through my many sources I found out the truth.
The other reason Clinton would want the hard drive is so he can have the social security number of one of Al Gore's daughters (it's on there). Which one has yet to be determined. Most people don't know that Clinton has a long standing feud with Al Gore due to the success of An Incovenient Truth. Clinton was never a fan of the environment, and at the first screening of the film, Clinton could be overheard saying, "Bill doesn't curb his green house gas emissions. I'll get you for this, Gore." Apparently he plans on acting as Gore's daughter in some diabolical plan that one can only assume involves sending prank hug-o-grams and such to Gore's home as a means of revenge.
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