Answer for Looking for Love

Looking for Love writes:

Dear the BOD

I have a dilema

I recently graduated college and got a new job. Congradulations to me right? WRONG no. Unfortunately and unlike you I can't grow a beard. All the people that work with me have some sort of facial hair, whether it is a superb and neatly trimmed handle bar mustache or a sloppy full grown beard that has nacho chips and dried saliva still attached to it. Do you understand my problem, what am i supposed to do. I have suspicions that they talk about me at work behind my back and make fun of my lack of hair growing ability.

My first option was to look on the internet for help. At first i noticed that there are options to have facial hair surgicly implanted but it seems too dangerous for me. Did you have this done? Second I can order hair from india where people grow hair even pubic! and you can buy it by the pound. How much would you recommend i buy? do you think 1 pound would be enough?

Also any other tips you have for supreme facial hair growing would be much appreciated.

My mother was born in england and my father was born in africa but is white if that helps explain why I have failure.

First off, I'm sorry to hear of your dilemma. You no doubt know of my astonishing beard growing abilities so I can't really relate to your problems. However, I will still try and help you get to the best possible option.

I think that if your co-workers can't accept you as you are then you might be in the wrong place. They should be able to look past your non-existent abilities to grow facial hair to who you really are. It's not your fault that you were born as a less of a man than everyone else.

If you feel you have to fit in, my first suggestion is to join in on the jokes. If you hear people talking about your lack of facial hair, embrace your flaw and join in on the jokes. They'll see that you can take a joke and that you don't take yourself too seriously. Say something like, "yeah I'm inept at growing facial hair, but you should see me in bed. ha ha ha." By joining in on the jokes you will become one of the guys and be much less uneasy at work. It's also much less drastic and dangerous than your other options.

If facial hair is your only option, surgery is definitely a possibility (although I have not had it done and am insulted to even be asked). It's just like hair plugs for your face. You just better find someone good because you don't want word to get out that you have face plugs like that. Everyone will immediately lose respect for you.

Another possible option is Rogaine or other hair growing products. Lather your face up with that stuff every night and you should be good to go. It will be more natural and make you feel like more of a man.

I do not recommend getting hair shipped to you. I don't know what you'd do with that hair anyway, but regardless it would probably be gross. You'd have to glue it on or something and I can't imagine that seeming very real. Besides, you won't know whose hair it is. This is facial hair we're talking about, and to have a beard is a great honor, and you don't want to betray that honor with gross hair glued on your face from someone you don't even know.

I hope this helps. I just think you should remember to be yourself and not give in to peer pressure so easily. Be true to yourself and everything else will fall into place.